Sex work and the people involved, especially the ones that go to a brothel, evoke different reactions. Most people think that women do it because they’re desperate for money and the guys are plain losers. So, let’s clear that misconception up right now. A disabled woman, who names we can’t share, will help with it. For the sake of simplicity let’s call her Lori. She dates handsome men, business professionals among others for good money. She is an independent escort girl with a neurological disability called dyspraxia. Sex work has brought a tremendous empowerment into her life and continues to do so to this very day.
She lives on permanent disability benefits, so she doesn’t have to work again. At least not at a regular job. In the past, she had a lot of trouble keeping her jobs. She has a bad working memory and she doesn’t quite „catch on” as most jobs would expect of her. Her slow processing speed and anxiety from sensory overload makes things pretty hard. But now, she has high knowing and wealthy men around her all the time. They take her out on stake dinners, parties have sex with her and tell her how amazing she is. Giving her a pretty amazing pay too.
Quick Info: Slut shaming is a problem to sex workers and regular girls alike. We talked about why in this article: http://sexbarvienna.com/news/effects-slut-shaming-girls-working-favorite-sex-bar/
Lori started sex work out of plain curiosity and because she wanted to earn some extra cash. Her career started when she signed up to a sugar daddy website. Her first client was a man who invited her to his hotel room to play with her feet. Sex work slowly worked it’s way up from her feet to the rest of her body. She is currently a freelance escort girl and she’s off quite well on her own. It’s harder than working in a brothel or an agency. But Lori knows from her job experience, that she’s much better off working alone.
She is good at this job because she loves it. It’s all about knowing people and exploring her sexuality, both of which she loves. It even seems better than her previous relationships and jobs she had. Having sex with these people doesn’t feel degrading for her. It was a lot more degrading to lose her job because she „just didn’t pick things up fast enough”. She wasn’t able to support herself for quite a while, which shattered her confidence. But now, she is meeting successful people and has a really rewarding job. In fact, she makes a lot more in less time than she would at any other job.
Her career in sex work made her realize that her time is valuable and that you can’t put a price tag on a person’s worth. She can decide how much her companionship costs and who she wants to give it to. Lori could finally find a job that actually worked for her. Sex work lets her take a day off when she is not feeling well. There’s no need for her to worry about money, because the amount she makes on a few days of work, has her covered for a while.
A New Understanding
Some of Lori’s past relationships were quite amusing. She didn’t get the respect she deserved and got her boundaries pushed plenty of times. The jobs she took ended up throwing her out of the loop. All of these experiences shattered her self-confidence. Not to mention that they made her feel more uncomfortable about her health. But after she started sex work, she settled these things once and for all.
Now, she is clear about her boundaries and if her client wants to cross them, it will cost him extra. If they want to have anal, it will cost them extra. If they want her to stay out with them longer, it will cost them even more. Maybe he wants to remove the condom when she isn’t paying attention. It’s a good thing that she got the money in advance. Lori finally has control. She does quite a lot of research on her clients before she sees them. Checking their references is crucial, even though everyone wants discretion. Still, lucky for her, almost all of them are gentlemen who have no problems with this. They just want to spend intimate time with her.
But this is still about work and business. Sometimes Lori would love to just stay home on some days and watch Netflix, especially when her anxiety kicks in. She is instead forced to go out and have some fun, maybe even a threesome. The guys cook her dinner, give her flowers and compliment her so that she feels comfortable. Most of them are shy and would go at things slowly. Have a good conversation before things get serious, instead of just wanting to go off. They want the connection and the intimacy that they feel missing. Everything goes at a normal speed and lets Lori go about her business days with complete comfort.
She was finally able to build her self-confidence and self-worth and it was mostly thanks to sex work. While some people see it as pure evil, some people see it as a real blessing from the sky!